I got an idea for this title from Jeff Foster (www.lifewithoutacentre.com ) when he was talking about depression and how it occurred to him that depression actually always leads to a deep rest. Why can depression be beneficial? Because it is a sign of our exhaustion and fighting with life and it's telling us (our our ego) to finally give up the fight and let go.
Foster is very much into non-duality wisdom, where person is nothing more than an idea in our minds.
So I always like to compare this kind of thinking with the game of golf and if it is possible to apply it in golf. In my experience it is much easier to recognize the inner world mechanisms while playing games, because our minds will be tested in a much more profound and direct way. So golf is a great opportunity for human beings to see how the reactive mind operates moment to moment.
It is not difficult to be in a good mood when we feel the swing is effortless and our score is matching our expectations. Still, I wonder if we understand that what really works at that peak moments is not some kind of special swing tip we got from our pro but our own capacity for being one with the surroundings. That's why we get the feeling of disappearance after a splendid shot or that we fly together with a ball. In such experience there is not much inner chatter going on.
On a days when we don't feel so good and our swing feels rusty, there lies opportunity to be on the guard like a watchman. In my experience the mind will try to find excuses outside and will blame anything imaginary to justify itself. Let's say we do a set up position and somehow we know that today's swing ain't gonna work. We feel disconnected in some way. Brain is telling us how to swing but our body is not understanding the message. Usually we either hurry up in a preparation process or become slower and start thinking more.Then we hit the ball and we immediately react with some words of complain and we show others that we are not pleased with the shot. Later on we usually try harder or try to fix the swing and most of the time it just gets worse until we end in a very bad mood on the 18th hole.
We can expect such processes in the game of golf. It's a long walk from the 1st to 18th hole and our moods will most probable change in between. I think it is important to understand how our mind is working when things don't go our way. It is a beautiful instrument, because it's nature is such that is always wanting to serve and to protect us. It is like a soldier waiting for instructions from us- generals. So when things are good, the mind doesn't complain at all; generals are obviously doing good job. When things go out of control the mind starts sending us signals that something is missing and it needs some help and guidance. It actually reminds us that we are asleep so to speak.(not really focused on what we are doing) There is a beautiful statement in a Book called Brain switch from the author A.B. Curtiss (www.depressionisachoice.com) : »To our own mind we are the president that must be protected at all cost. To protect us, our mind is always looking for trouble, chasing down the negative, peering into every dusty, dark neuronal corner. That is its job and it is always on duty, even when we are asleep or not paying any attention to what we are thinking.«
Another important thing to understand is that we never miss the shot on purpose. Certain thoughts occupie our brains at certain moments and for every shot we make, the Universe responds to our way of thinking. We can't really help if the negative thought like :« don't hook it again« visits our brain just before we start the backswing. So instead of beating ourselves up,we can detach from the outcome every time and accept the situation the way it is. It's a good idea to do something completely opposite of what the reactive mind is telling us. Instead of grumble when can put a junior smile in the corner of our lips. There might be some inner resistance but hey, we can learn to accept that too. Bellow are some tips from my book »Golf from inside out« on how to stay emotionally detached after a bad shot:
- watch the ball until it lands ;
- count how many seconds it takes for the ball to stop;
- stop verbalizing in a negative way;
- embrace unpleasant feelings and see what happens;
- smile on the inside and breath deeper;
- start singing a song or repeating a nonsense phrase like: yellow sun, yellow sun, yellow sun,..
- move on with your commitment.
If we managed to detach from our dissatisfaction and impulsive reactions, don't expect feeling good immediately. It will most probable take a hole or two to neutralize our emotions and that's already feeling better isn't it? No matter how you will score the next hole, you will feel OK and slowly the door to more pleasant emotions will open. The neutral state is very important because it teaches us patience and humbleness. And because we notice the positive change in our mood, we don't wanna go towards opposite direction again. At least for the current round not.
So I always like to compare this kind of thinking with the game of golf and if it is possible to apply it in golf. In my experience it is much easier to recognize the inner world mechanisms while playing games, because our minds will be tested in a much more profound and direct way. So golf is a great opportunity for human beings to see how the reactive mind operates moment to moment.
It is not difficult to be in a good mood when we feel the swing is effortless and our score is matching our expectations. Still, I wonder if we understand that what really works at that peak moments is not some kind of special swing tip we got from our pro but our own capacity for being one with the surroundings. That's why we get the feeling of disappearance after a splendid shot or that we fly together with a ball. In such experience there is not much inner chatter going on.
On a days when we don't feel so good and our swing feels rusty, there lies opportunity to be on the guard like a watchman. In my experience the mind will try to find excuses outside and will blame anything imaginary to justify itself. Let's say we do a set up position and somehow we know that today's swing ain't gonna work. We feel disconnected in some way. Brain is telling us how to swing but our body is not understanding the message. Usually we either hurry up in a preparation process or become slower and start thinking more.Then we hit the ball and we immediately react with some words of complain and we show others that we are not pleased with the shot. Later on we usually try harder or try to fix the swing and most of the time it just gets worse until we end in a very bad mood on the 18th hole.
We can expect such processes in the game of golf. It's a long walk from the 1st to 18th hole and our moods will most probable change in between. I think it is important to understand how our mind is working when things don't go our way. It is a beautiful instrument, because it's nature is such that is always wanting to serve and to protect us. It is like a soldier waiting for instructions from us- generals. So when things are good, the mind doesn't complain at all; generals are obviously doing good job. When things go out of control the mind starts sending us signals that something is missing and it needs some help and guidance. It actually reminds us that we are asleep so to speak.(not really focused on what we are doing) There is a beautiful statement in a Book called Brain switch from the author A.B. Curtiss (www.depressionisachoice.com) : »To our own mind we are the president that must be protected at all cost. To protect us, our mind is always looking for trouble, chasing down the negative, peering into every dusty, dark neuronal corner. That is its job and it is always on duty, even when we are asleep or not paying any attention to what we are thinking.«
Another important thing to understand is that we never miss the shot on purpose. Certain thoughts occupie our brains at certain moments and for every shot we make, the Universe responds to our way of thinking. We can't really help if the negative thought like :« don't hook it again« visits our brain just before we start the backswing. So instead of beating ourselves up,we can detach from the outcome every time and accept the situation the way it is. It's a good idea to do something completely opposite of what the reactive mind is telling us. Instead of grumble when can put a junior smile in the corner of our lips. There might be some inner resistance but hey, we can learn to accept that too. Bellow are some tips from my book »Golf from inside out« on how to stay emotionally detached after a bad shot:
- watch the ball until it lands ;
- count how many seconds it takes for the ball to stop;
- stop verbalizing in a negative way;
- embrace unpleasant feelings and see what happens;
- smile on the inside and breath deeper;
- start singing a song or repeating a nonsense phrase like: yellow sun, yellow sun, yellow sun,..
- move on with your commitment.
If we managed to detach from our dissatisfaction and impulsive reactions, don't expect feeling good immediately. It will most probable take a hole or two to neutralize our emotions and that's already feeling better isn't it? No matter how you will score the next hole, you will feel OK and slowly the door to more pleasant emotions will open. The neutral state is very important because it teaches us patience and humbleness. And because we notice the positive change in our mood, we don't wanna go towards opposite direction again. At least for the current round not.